Thursday, 20 January 2011

Twelve Angry Cats...


The above feline is named Sal Esposito and if she is looking distinctly startled, there is a good reason. Ever at the cutting edge of legal blogging, the rabbit can reveal that Sal has been summoned for jury service in Boston, Massachusetts, despite being - erm - a cat. Let Sal's owner, Anna Esposito take up the story: 'Sal is a member of the family so I listed her on the last census form under pets but there has clearly been a mix-up'.

Quite so. The rabbit scratches his head at the idea of a census form that requires details of resident pets in the first place but that's by the way.

A jury summons duly appeared for Sal, much to the bemusement of his - one may suspect intellectually challenged - owners. Anna Esposito filed to have her pet disqualified from the service requirement on the grounds he is 'unable to speak and understand English'. She even included a letter from her vet explaining that Sal is not a human being but a 'domestic short-haired neutered feline'.

Very reasonable points too, I am sure all will agree but the court rejected the request, and as things stand, Sal will have to report for duty to Suffolk Superior Court in Boston on March 23.

The rabbit awaits developments but does recall that his youth (or early adulthood more strictly) he lived in a house with a TV Licence holding cat. The relevant licence was in the name of Ms B. A. Catt - the relevant cat being called Brian despite being female for reasons too convoluted and dull to explain. He also recalls a cat named Florence who was on the electoral roll as Florence A Catt. Unlike Sal, Florence's entry was deliberate and a joke. Also unlike Sal (I assume) Florence actually voted in a general election via a human representative who presented herself at the polling station and gave Florence's name. Florence voted Liberal if you were wondering. Hat Tip to Mahal.

14 comments:

Scarlet Blue said...

Sounds like a catastrophe in the making...
Sx

sybil law said...

I saw that story yesterday, too!
And I think that cat is probably better suited to jury duty than half the other jurors, anyway.
Plus, what if the case is about a cat burglar?!
I am sooo cheesy...

Laci the Chinese Crested said...

Sybil, it would be excused in voir dire if there were a cat burglar being tried.

It reminds me of the Canadian Parti Rhinoceros which was known for its interesting candidates. One Parti Rhino member ran in one riding (district) and ran his dog in another. The comment was that he "ran" the dog there everyday.

B.E. Earl said...

I wish I had thought of listing our cats on our census form. Brilliant!

JoJo said...

This is what happens when stupid people think they are being funny and include their pets on things like the census. I don't recall it asking if we had pets. As much as our 2 dogs are part of our family, and we've joked about listing them as tax deductions, we would never do that.

Petit fleur said...

This made my whole day!

Law Minx said...

cat burglars notwithstanding, what about matters concerning Ladies of the Night, otherwise known in Plod Circles as Toms?!
the judicial confusion that might result really doesnt bear thinking about.......

Short Poems said...

Funny :)

simply wondered said...

rabbit - in response to your kind comment at the blog, i have produced another post. mirabile dictu! you do that voodoo that you do so well. i will buy you a carrot when your gentle prodding has moved me to complete my book!

white rabbit said...

Sorry peoples - been busy so slow to respond to comments...

Simply Blue - Boom! Boom! are you Basil Brush in disguise?

Sybil/Laci/Minx -If the cat showed partiality to defendant cats on the basis of their shared catness then they would not be allowed to sit...

Earl/JoJo - I don't know what to say to your comments as regards your difference of opinion as to the merits of doing the pets on census thing.

Little Flower - We aim to please.

Short Poems - welcome to my humble blog. A short comment too :D

SW - I'm glad. You should have received e-mail by now!

DaisyDeadhead said...

I'm sure the kitty will make a fine juror.

white rabbit said...

Daisy - I've had drunk jurors, jurors who fell asleep, one juror who the other jurors refused to sit next to because he was so smelly so Sal would probably do no worse than many...

tony said...

Judging by the way my cat torments the local [small] wildlife, I'd hate to see one facing me if I were a defendant in court.

Sarcastic Bastard said...

That shit made me laugh. I have 7 cats, so we could really load the ballot box.

Love you.